How do you know if you heard God or if you missed it all together? I tried something new to me. It was outside my comfortzone. I offered to lead Bible study. I was safe snd comfortable in my recovery group as a leader. Why try something new?

I love the book Finding Spiritual Whitespace:Awakening Your Soul to Rest by Bonnie Gray. I have thought about doing this study since before I received the book. Bonnie is my friend. I dismissed this idea though because I did not want to go out of my comfortzone. After reading the her book, correction, devoured her book, I read her book two more times. I still dismissed the small voice inside me, others need spiritual rest too. But then I saw the invite from the Women’s Ministry Leader, asking someone to step out of there comfortzone. I knew God was saying it was me they were talking to. I said yes. I stepped out of my recovery group leadership.

It came to the first night, three ladies showed up. We got started. Slowly for their own reasons they dropped out, until it was me and one other. I called her and asked what she wanted to do,out o respect for her and her time. I would be more than willing to continue, but it was decided to stop the group.

Did I fail God? Did I even hear him right? Where are you in a dissolved Bible study?

I called a friend to share my grief with. She pointed out that I had courage to step out in faith. I shared with another friend, she pointed out often when called to lead a study it is because she needs it, not others.

I let Bonnie know also. She reminded me of the list of those who were called faithful in Hebrews, stumbled and did not see the results. I am still sad it is over. I still fight feelings of failure.

God is good.
All the time.
All the time.
God is good.

I trust now that I chose to follow Him. The results were up to Him.

Do you struggle with knowing you heard God? I do. You are not alone. Read Hebrews 11.

Trust God even when it doesn’t make sense.


4 thoughts on “Faithful

  1. Oh, how often we judge our “success” or “failure” by how many people show up or not. I do the same thing, Katie. But thankfully God does not! It’s a great testimony to him that you stepped out in faith to start the group, and that you gave the grace to postpone it (because you may start it again later with another group!). You’ve done it once and the Lord may use you to do it again.

    Nothing we do for the Lord is ever wasted, and I know he’ll use this experience to build your faith even stronger. You’re awesome for sharing this with us! It encourages me to let go of human results and step out in faith when God calls me, regardless of how it turns out on the outside.

  2. Katie, May I share what my dear friend and mentor, Mary, told me many years ago after I had an experience which left me with the same kinds of questions?

    Mary told me of a time when she agreed to host a special prayer meeting at her home. She prayed and prepared and set out extra seating. No. One. Came.

    About 15 minutes or so after the set time, she went to her chores and after starting a load of sheets in the washer; she sat on the steps and sought the Lord with tears and questions. He quieted her with the thoughts that He had called many and had special blessings for each one, but one by one they had found other things to do. (sounds like a familiar story in the Bible, yes?) Anyway, she told me she was able to pray for each one and left the burden with Him, resting in peace and the knowledge that she had answered His call.

    Being faithful to answer when He calls is our good work and sometimes that is all He is looking for, I think.

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